Lost wishes
by Jossette Saint Claire
Summary: 'I wanna be da princess' at six years old all Aeron wanted to be was a princess, but now at 19 all she wants is to work. Marrying someone would take away her money that she needs. The money she has earned.
1. The ring

Sitting in my parents' house I watched the screen.

"_Hi my name is Aeron and I wanna be da princess!" _

A small girl with her hair cut short stands in front of a camera, wearing a tiara. Cake icing smeared on her face. People stand around her smiling and laughing. A strong male voice starts to talk.

"_Maybe one day you can be, then you can buy __**us**__ birthday cakes."_

They all laughed, it was seemed like so much fun. That's my birthday party, I had just turned six and wanted nothing more than to be a princess. Now, as the year that my name will be put into the drawing, I didn't want to be one. I want to work, I don't want to marry. A year after I had made that statement, my mother died, leaving me alone with my father who had quickly become a drunk, an angry drunk. So I went into the one thing I was good at, fighting. My family, we're seven's. Just above total chaos. I started to take fights when dad couldn't get a job, when he started drinking. When my life fell apart.

I used to look up at the sky, and try to find all the constellations. I never can, I can only find my mom's favorite. Aires, that was her favorite. If I was a boy, I'm sure my name would have been Aires instead of Aeron. After turning the TV off, I looked up into the stars while I got ready. Seeing Aires up there I said a quick prayer to my mother. I hope she sees me, and cheers me on. As I walk into my own little hell.

Around the ring were the people who could afford to get in. Up in the box, those were the two's, three's, sometimes even a four got in. But that was rare, ones though. Ones never came, they didn't want to be seen with us. Who cares around the stupid queen? She's never helped me, my family. Who cares?

Sighing I watched the girl walk in, she was small, most likely an 8 who needed money, she couldn't be older then twelve. Her face was bruised and scraped, probably from a different fight. My face couldn't have looked any better; this was my fifth fight of the night. Now that I think of it, I did have a few bruises, just here and there. Not many, I dominated in my fights. I couldn't afford to lose, this girl she looks like she's come close to losing but came back in the end.

The crowd buzzed, then all went silent. That's when I went for her. She wasn't going to stay up for much longer. I kicked her in the head in other words. She fell, she fell hard. Her body hit the floor as I circled the ring waiting for her to get back up, if she could. I'm not like the other fights, they would've kept going after she was down. Not me, if she wants to get up she can, I'm not going to keep her from getting up.

They yelled for her to get, but others told her to stay down. Don't move. The crowd was screaming and yelling, until a door opened. The silence was horrible. That deafening silence could have killed someone. The group walked up to the box. People mumbled, I heard them whispering over my beating heart as the ref grabbed the girl off the ring. She wasn't going to get up for a while, she was out. They took her up to the box. Why was she going to the box? Before I could think about it, my next opponent came out to the ring. Guess I don't have time to wonder why.


	2. The selection

I walked out of the building a little after curfew. The wind blew cold as I walked home. It was far, only a few streets. As I walked I looked up into the sky. Watching as the stars moved, looking for more than just Aires.

My heart stopped when I heard something behind me get kicked, turning around I see the group that had walked in, the group that took the girl up to the box. The muscles in my body tensed, preparing the fight or flight mode we all come with. I don't flee, I fight.

One of the men raised his arms into the sky "We come in peace, I swear."

The guy couldn't have been older then 19, but he looked clean, maybe he was a teacher or musician.

Raising an eyebrow my body relaxed "What do you want?"

"I just wanted to thank you." He smiled softly watching me, like I was an animal.

Crossing my arms, I sighed. Really? Just an apology. "For what, not kicking the shit out of the girl you pulled into the box?"

He seemed to laugh a little, his eyes crinkled, as the corners of his lips turned up. "Yes, not kicking my sister till she was bloody is what I am thanking you for. Some of those girls can be brutal."

"I know, I've been fighting, against them for years." Out of the corner of my eye I see the girl, she's dressed in warmer clothing, and her face had been cleaned. Raising my hand I pointed at her "Keep her out of the ring. She shouldn't have been in there in the first place."

He sighs, as he nodded in agreement. "She wasn't supposed to be here."

I nodded, she probably didn't tell them where she was. I stood there a little longer, waiting for someone to say something, or do something. Finally after a bit, I rubbed my shoulders as the cold wind blew.

"Well, I'm going to get home, its past curfew."

The guy looked up in surprise, the wind blowing his hair into his eyes "Ok, well till we see each other next time." He bowed, then took the girl and walked away. He bowed, seriously. The whole big arm across the chest and duck down.

Well I got home, safe and sound. Even after the weird bowing thing. I changed out of my clothes and went to take a shower. Dad would be stuck at whatever bar he had ended up at, they can't allow you to leave since curfew is in place. I pulled my hair out of my ponytail then looked into the mirror. All I can see is her. My mother, her beautiful black hair, her fierce green eyes. Her pale face. I see her, I don't see me. The only bits of me that I see, are the bruises lining my chin and eyes. Looking away from the mirror I turned on the shower, and stepped into the water fall.

I was quickly surrounded by warmth, the feeling of safety. I love the warmth, when this time of the year the warmth is gone and I feel unsafe. I hate the cold. I hate it with a passion. I don't have clothes for this time of the year which sucks horribly. But, oh well. I'm making the money to stay afloat, I don't need warm clothes. What I do need is sleep.

I woke up the next morning to my dad standing in my room.

"Your awake finally, hurry let's get you to my sisters so you can get ready." He was clean, he smell of coffee and mint. Not beer and whiskey. I got under and got dressed, then headed out to him. He quickly ushered me out of the house and down to my aunts.

When she opened the door she smiled, pulling me in and soon I was bombarded with clothing. They dressed me, did my hair, and some make up to hide the bruises. They talked about how I'll make it for sure, how I could win. Win what? What am I getting entered into?

Pulling at my hand they ushered me down the street, to the building in the center of town. Girls from all classes lined up. Some short, tall, fat, and small. It was mass chaos. I was put into a line, and stood there for what seemed like forever. I was finally at the front, when another person grabbed me. I'm really getting tired of being grabbed. My picture was taken, and I was asked some questions.

When I walked out my aunt was smiling, and wrapped her arms around me. "I knew you'd be willing to be put in the drawing."

"Drawing for what?" My eyebrow raised, as I crossed my arms.

"The selection." She smiled brightly

"What the hell! You put me into the drawing?! I don't want to be in the drawing, not even the selection! I want to stay here and work!" I was angry, scratch that I was pissed. I couldn't control my anger so I blew up on my aunt, which wasn't a good idea. She got that lost puppy look in her eyes as they glazed over with tears.

"Your father said…"

"My father was wrong." I took my hair out of the ridiculous bun, and wiped the makeup off my face. I walked home, I didn't want anyone to talk to me, bug me, or anything. I just wanted to be alone. I ducked into the small somewhat forest we had. I kept walking until I came across the grave yard, and followed my heart straight to my mothers. I knelt down in front of her, and sighed.

"Mom, I don't know if you can hear me, but I need help. Dad, he told his sister I would go into the drawing willingly. I don't want to be a princess." But in the back of my mind, I still heard my six year old self, say how much she wanted to be the princess. "I can't do this, I just want to work. I don't want to marry mom." Tears started to run down my face as my breathing got heavier. "Mom I can't do this without you, I need you here. Why'd you go? Why'd you leave me with dad? Why do I have to be alone?"

I hit the ground next to me, as tears ran down my face. I can't do this, but I'm going to. My mom would want me to, she wouldn't want me to run away from this problem. She would want me to be happy, I might be the next queen. But I'd never fit in there. I don't belong in the princesses, and princes' world. I just don't.

Several weeks past, and I was forced to sit down at my aunts while she had the TV going. They were going to announce it tonight. Tonight is the night my fate would be announced. We watched and listened, they named off about twenty girls or so, so I decided to zone out. I soon fell asleep.

Soon I was jolted awake by everyone screaming and yelling. Looking at the screen my heart dropped. That was my picture. No that was my mom, it can't be me. I don't look like that. Her hair shiny and her face was pale and unmarked by bruises. That can't be me.

"And our final choice, Aeron Juene. Class Seven…"


End file.
